6 Reasons Why Students Are Afraid To Ask for Help (And What You Can Do About It)

Written by Mr Mustafa in Teachers' Lounge 

The age-old question comes up every year, which is why won’t my students ask questions? Finding out your students struggle with the learning material after the fact is frustrating for you and them. There are six critical factors to consider when you wonder why your students are afraid to ask for help.

Here are 6 reasons why students are afraid to ask for help:

  1. Cultural differences.
  2. They want to appear smart.
  3. Personality differences.
  4. They perceive their teacher as unapproachable. 
  5. They do not want to “bother” someone.
  6. They do not know where to start.

Understanding that each student is an individual from a different background, home expectation, and personality type is vital to their learning. It may seem like extra work to cater to each student, but you can help your class feel more comfortable asking questions and learning better with a few tweaks. 

1. Cultural Differences

America is a melting pot, and the odds are pretty good that you’ll have at least one student from a different cultural background than you or the other students. Even if your student has adjusted socially, some circumstances prohibit them from addressing you in class. 

For example, it’s impolite to question or “challenge” the teacher in many countries since you’re an authority figure. 

Other cultures teach and learn by receiving the information and reporting the data back – or read and regurgitate it. Your open forum for discussion may discourage the student from participating.

Students might be uncomfortable approaching a teacher of the opposite sex. It may even be against the student’s religion to be alone with a person of the opposite sex, and they don’t want to disrespect their religious laws. 

English language learners may feel like they do not know how to ask questions. They may not want to stumble over their question in front of the other students and risk the teacher misunderstanding. 

In this case, the question would go unanswered anyway. 

How To Help

It can be difficult to know what your students need, especially when they come from different cultural backgrounds. If you want to help your students learn and grow, here are some good methods to use:

  • Assign student helpers. You don’t want other students distracted during the lesson, but setting aside time for the students with difficulties to engage with their peers is beneficial. Students learn more from their peers because they can explain concepts differently, or even in another language that the student understands. 
  • Set clear expectations. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Students with cultural differences may have difficulty understanding slang or nuanced language. 
  • Practice with small discussion groups. Other students may be able to provide a different perspective of the material, which helps the student with difficulty. 
  • Use a mix of reading/answer questions and group discussions. Since one student may learn differently than another, you’ll want to provide a variety of ways to present the lesson. Some students will stand out in the debate, while others may not be able to verbalize their answers so clearly but can write them down distinctly. 

2. They Want To Appear Smart

In school, I hated asking questions. I always worried that I was the only one who didn’t understand, and I wanted to maintain my status as the “smart kid.” In my experience, not asking questions didn’t uphold my title, and instead, it only frustrated me further. 

Students who feel pressure to perform well in school and be independent don’t want to disappoint their teachers, peers, or themselves. Your student may feel like they aren’t meeting the level of their classmates. 

They could also fear retribution for “not paying attention.” 

Additionally, students who regularly do well in class will make mistakes now and then. Your student may not have completed the previous night’s assignment or reading and does not want you to know. 

How To Help

Even smarter students need help once in a while. If you notice that some of your smarter students are struggling, you might need to spend some time talking with them privately about what might be wrong. 

Here are some other ways to help your smarter students:

  • Encourage an environment of questions. Teach your students that smart people ask questions all the time. Science is all about asking questions to find the answer.
  • Make a private time for questions. Provide a time for anonymous questions the students may have but are embarrassed to ask. If technology allows, allow students to send you messages in class through email or another messaging program. You could also have the student put sticky notes in their folder or planner that you review daily. 
  • Go over homework in class. Reviewing homework may be time-consuming, but it’ll pay off in the long run. Giving explanations and examples may clear up some last-minute confusion or provide the student a second chance to ask about the material. 

3. Personality Differences

Personality plays a part in relationship building between you and your students. You’ve already realized that each student has a unique personality. When you have introverted students, they are stimulated by what they read, think, and internalize, whereas the world and people outside themselves encourage an extroverted student. 

Introverted students may not be shy or quiet, but they require time to themselves to absorb the information. 

These learners can benefit from individual assignments that they can complete at their own pace. Conversely, extroverted students may not be talkative or disruptive, but they require interaction and can benefit from group projects versus solo assignments. 

How To Help

If you already know which students are “shy” and which ones are outgoing, you can perhaps tailor your lessons and teaching styles to your students and their needs. Here are some other ways to help your students speak up:

  • Start with a soft-ball question to warm up. In sports, you need to warm up before a challenging game. Help coax the quiet and reserved students out of their shells with more straightforward questions in the beginning. 
  • Give the discussion questions in the homework the night before. Instill confidence with preparation. Give the student time to think about what will be discussed and expected. 
  • Balance structure with open discussion. Not every student will be able to perform as well in a competitive environment. Allow for open debate but balance that time with direct question/answer teaching.

4. They Perceive Their Teacher As Unapproachable

Perception is everything. You can be the most helpful teacher, and you still cannot figure out why your students aren’t approaching you with their questions. 

Is it possible your students don’t see you as approachable? 

Your personality isn’t the problem but acknowledging how your students perceive your comments or mannerisms is essential. Teachers are ordinary people, and you might have issues outside of work that may be on your mind. You have unique traits that make you, you! 

You have days that you do not feel well. On days that you aren’t feeling well, or if you don’t naturally smile regularly, your student may regard you as unapproachable. 

Additionally, your personality may discourage students from involvement. 

An introverted student may be intimidated or exhausted by an extroverted teacher, and they may need to recharge themselves with more alone time. On the other hand, extroverted students may not reach out because they think their introverted teacher isn’t as receptive to their needs. 

How To Help

You might not see that you’re unapproachable to your students, so you’ll need to reach out to another faculty member for some advice. They might be able to help you figure out where you can improve and how you can be more approachable.

Here are some other ways to become more approachable:

  • Learn their name. Students are individual people. The first sign that they can trust you is that you know who they are outside of the class.
  • Tell them your personality style on the first day. It’s okay that you don’t naturally smile or have frequent side conversations. Just tell your students who you are so they know what to expect from you.
  • Tone it down for introverted students or push outside your comfort zone for extroverted students. You don’t have to change your personality to fit every student, but some students will need you to be softer and gentler while others will need to see more excitement. Tailor your demeanor appropriately.
  • Incorporate learning games in your lectures/lessons. Break outside the box and show the students that learning isn’t just homework and reading. Students will relax with you when they see your fun side.

5. They Do Not Want To “Bother” Someone

How many times have you tried to juggle 15 things at once? Probably often. Imagine how often your students hear someone tell them, “I’m busy right now.” You’re only one person in the student’s life, and you’ve to balance the structure and schedule of the classroom. The phrase, “I’m busy,” can trigger students to think their question isn’t worth their time. 

That isn’t your intention, but perception is everything to students. 

You’ve also had to use the phrase, “stop distracting your neighbor,” because you intend to focus the student back on the lesson without disturbing another student’s learning process. These statements can lead students not to utilize their peers as resources. 

How To Help

You want to be there for your students, but you also have a ton of work to do because of the shortage of teachers. But this shouldn’t affect how you interact with your students. Here are some methods you can use to minimize this:

  • Group work. Working in smaller circles or groups helps students see that their partners are working on the same goals. 
  • Circle around the classroom during “study hall” and spot-check their work. I know that study hall is a great time to catch up on grading papers and finishing lesson plans. A quick stroll around the classroom and interaction with the students makes you more available to answer questions than if you look busy at your desk. 
  • Make office hours or be available at certain times for questions. Tell your students you’re available during office hours. Set this schedule ahead of time and inform your students so they can meet in a private setting. 
  • Initiate conversation and be approachable. Ask open-ended questions to initiate conversation. Instead of “Are you finished with your assignment?” Try “What are you struggling with in the reading? How can I help?”
  • Provide resources, such as the library, websites, or books. I am sure you always tell your students to cite their sources. Practice what you preach. Tell your students, “I didn’t know what this term meant, so I Googled it, and here is what I found.” You’ll teach your students that even you, the all-knowing teacher, still need to ask questions and investigate.

6. They Do Not Know Where To Start

It’s difficult for students to catch up when they already feel behind. You may have been grading papers and realized a particular student didn’t grade as high as usual. 

When I was in school, I’d pay attention and take notes, but I would stare at the homework like it was written in a foreign language when I got home. My mom would ask, “Why didn’t you ask the teacher a question when you didn’t understand?” The truth was, I didn’t realize I didn’t understand the material while I was in class. 

Students don’t inherently know how to take notes, and the material they review after the lesson is only helpful if the information is complete. 

The lecture or lesson may have been too fast-paced, and the student didn’t have time to reflect and review the information. At the time, it’ll seem like the class is on board and ready to move on. 

Your students may not realize where you lost them in the lesson when they’re rolling through the material quickly. 

How To Help

The YouTube channel SchoolHabits provides a helpful and engaging video for students on how to help themselves and then know when to ask for help. 

Here are some other ways to help your students understand the material:

  • Ask the student to start from the beginning and “teach” you. Students can retain knowledge better when they learn it and then teach it. You’ll see where the student got lost, and you’ll be able to backtrack to help them understand.
  • Teach the class how you want them to take notes. Notes are essential when it comes to reviewing information after class. Some students have their method, but others may not have experience with note-taking. Give them a basis and let them tweak it to their liking.
  • Slow down and have a short discussion/summary at the end of each lesson section. Wrap up the lesson with an outline. This final bit gives the students time to absorb the information and clear up any misunderstandings they may have.

Learning Styles

The National Library of Medicine published an experiment in 2021. It was conducted by six scientists in the medical faculty at the Suez Canal University in Egypt on the Influence of Personality Traits and Learning Styles on Undergraduate Medical Students’ Academic Achievement. 

The five personality traits they focused on were:

  • Openness
  • Conscientiousness
  • Extraversion
  • Agreeableness
  • Neuroticism 

There are ranges of these personality traits depending on if the student is an introvert or extrovert. This means that the student could be on the introvert or extrovert end of openness, for example. 

The learning styles are visual, auditory, reading/writing, and doing (kinesthetic). 

This experiment showed no differences in learning regarding personality types, although we discussed how personality plays a role in your student’s comfortability by asking questions. However, the experiment showed that more students learned by doing (kinesthetics). 

In short, this experiment showed a higher portion of the sample population did better on tests as kinesthetic learners. It also showed that most students surveyed fell into the openness or 

agreeableness. 

Why Learning Style Leads to Better Questions

You want to be able to reach as many students as possible, and introducing various learning styles in your teaching will prompt your students to explore the material in depth. 

Kinesthetic learning showed higher test results at 43%, but auditory learners came in second at 30% of the population. Also, the study found that 87% of the students sampled preferred two or more methods of learning to produce higher test results. 

Kinesthetic learners may not understand the material by reading a text, and auditory learners may not be able to grasp the whole concept of the lesson by solely watching you perform the lesson. 

Opening up another side to the lesson will allow the student to feel more comfortable understanding the information or increase their confidence to say, “I understand when we did XYZ, but here’s where I got lost.” 

Tips for Teaching Students To Ask “Good” Questions

You have heard, and probably said, the phrase, “There are no bad questions,” right? 

That may be true, but some questions don’t relate to the lesson material. Asking unrelated questions happens less frequently with adult students, but younger learners must learn to ask solid and engaging questions related to the lesson. 

Teacher Jackie Walsh taught her students to pause before asking a question. She states that the few seconds the student takes to process the information leads to a better-formulated question, rather than saying the first thing that comes to mind. 

Students need to learn how to ask questions. 

Walsh addressed this issue and created a downloadable outline to share with teachers to help their students develop a deeper understanding of the material. 

Walsh also says she doesn’t ask, “Do you’ve any questions?” and instead opts for “What kinds of questions do you have?” This slight difference in wording changes the student’s thought process from a single yes or no answer to an open-ended discussion.

Sources

Mr Mustafa

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